So She Went Until She Couldn't Went No More

She swore she just couldn't hold on anymore. She had been now, for many years. She didn't want to be held back anymore, she wanted to be free.

The only reason she couldn't, was those around her. Yeah, she cared about them dearly, but they've dampening her wings ever since she could form an opinion that was just hers.

Lately, they've done more than that. They poured a huge shit-ton-a water on those wings of hers. How could she fly? She needed to fly.

You can't hold her back. It's just wrong. Against her purpose.

So she decided she was done with holding back, pleasing others, waiting. She left, went out of her being.

But that's just the thing. She went out of her being. Her being was being who she was now. Yeah, her wings get dampened, but she's got a towel. She just doesn't know how to use it yet.

So, she went until she couldn't went no more.

'I hope you do too.'

She always did tend to have a lot of emotion.

"Just a reminder, I guess... No matter what, no matter what goes down or up, no matter how often we hurt each other or make fools of ourselves, no matter what we look like or how we look at things, no matter how hard we laugh or how bitterly we cry, no matter if we 'hate' each other or 'love' each other, no matter if we're curled up in a ball gasping for air because our tears are literally drowning us with physical and mental pain or we're just shedding a single tear, no matter where we are now or where we end up... I will always be there for you. You may believe me with every inch of your soul or spit at this with every inch of your being, but I know I mean it. I hope you do too."

She didn't do specifics very often. But this was specifically... to a list of people, and to... well, basically anyone.

She just kinda... loves.

Who Are You?

She wondered if it was 'bad' if you couldn't answer the question 'Who are you?'

She saw people who knew all about themselves. They knew their own style, their own manner of speaking, what slang they used, how they typed, how they acted, what they did.

Some had everything down.

She was always saying how 'she was still figuring out who she was.' She had been saying that phrase for some time now. Then it hit her.

Maybe... Maybe people aren't supposed to know who they are. As they continue on through life, they change. There really isn't a constant.

When people ask 'Who are you?' the usual response is a name. What they're called by. They don't respond with details about themselves. So maybe 'Who are you?' is really 'What's your name?'

People have characteristics. Someone might be able to answer 'Who are you right now?' But they cannot answer 'Who are you?' as a general forever. You just never know.

So she'll stick to her usual answer, and need no explanation.

'I am Kayla.'

Reasoning, Experiencing

There doesn't always have to be a reason.

Doing things on a whim can lead to adventures, new places, new faces, new experiences, new perspective. Sometimes you just gotta do it to do it.

A person may be looked upon with doubt and confusion at the mention of trying something seemingly random, but that person may lead you to something you never even imagined experiencing.

~~~

She wanted an adventure. Wanted something new. Not really a reason for it, just a want. An almost need.

'Can we just drive somewhere random?' She asked him out of pure intuition, or maybe instinct? Maybe just a general attraction. She wasn't sure.

'I mean, let's not know where we're going. Let's go somewhere we haven't been and just drive.'

He was fine with it, but they ended up getting the idea to go to their park instead. They wanted to walk the trails in the winter.

It had ended up being too cold. They went back to her place and watched a movie.

The night had ended well. She was falling for him and he for her, but that wasn't the point in this sense.

Though that point being bigger than this, she still never went on her adventure. She forgot.

It wasn't a big deal. But it could be.